Eating disorders are MORE than just a NUMBER.

mental health, Uncategorized

*There may be some sensitive content for some viewers. Information/details on eating disorders.*

I dealt with an eating disorder for 10 years. Most of the time I had disordered eating patterns, but all of the time I had body image issues. I know people who haven’t experienced an eating disorder or recovery may think that it all just revolves around the number. The more weight you lose the worse your disorder actually is. In fact, this is why I didn’t think I had an eating disorder until my 10th year of dealing with it. I’m glad there is more talk on mental health so I would like to just touch up on some things that may come along with an eating disorder.

  • It is a mental health issue: This isn’t just a physical problem. There is a chemical imbalance in ones brain which causes them to think and feel different. Of course this then can lead to physical problems. Some of which include an unhealthy weight, poor dental hygiene, bone issues, heart issues, and etc.
    • Body dysmorphia is part of an eating disorder: The way one thinks about themselves is very important to identifying an eating disorder. I personally pictured myself very different in my head compared to how I really looked in person. It can also be an obsession with physical experience that can take up most of a persons time.
    • There are many different types of an eating disorder: Speaking from my own experience, I had binge eating disorder. What this meant is that I would spend days not eating full meals and then decided to eating everything in site in one day. Along with this I had obsessive thoughts about my appearance.
    • You don’t have to be at a certain weight to have an eating disorder: Everybody’s body is different. This means everyone will have a healthy body weight that may not be the same as the person next to them. My weight fluctuated a lot, but I was never really thin or really overweight. I looked healthy so I thought I was. This is what I meant by it being a mental illness. Just because someone doesn’t look sick doesn’t mean they aren’t.

    I hope this gives a little insight on eating disorders. Please feel free to share your own thoughts or anything I might’ve left out in the comments below. If you or anyone you know might be suffering with an eating disorder, check out the website below for some more information:

    National Eating Disorders Association

    Thank you for reading,

    Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    I’m Moving…Again. Ego aside.

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    One month ago I made a move to a new state. I lasted one week, cried for a long time, and came running back home. I came back with mixed feelings. Being in a your 20’s is a funny thing. Feeling like I needed to simply have my shit together so settling for a little less on my paycheck wasn’t cutting it for me. I got scared and thought rent would lead to more problems. After being home for a month now, I’ve decided I quit too early. I gave up on myself and was looking for comfort. Familiarity is my comfort. As much as I wanted to get out of my hometown, it was comfortable.

    It’s not easy trying new things. It’s not easy packing your whole life and starting a new way of life in a new city. Turns out, life isn’t easy. There are going to be many times where I will be placed into uncomfortable situations, but if I never am when will I grow?  This sounded less cheesier in my head. Point is, I need to fight for what I want. I need to work hard and put my pride aside. I will have plenty of time to be a business owner and live the life I’ve always wanted. In order to get that I need to work my face off right now so that in the future I can find new comfort and familiarity.  There is more to life than money and your career. How do I know this? Because after spending these past couple of years miserable in a city I once loved and dealing with various health problems, things become a bit more clear.

    If there is one thing you will take away from this blog I hope it is that everyone is fighting a battle. You are not alone. I’ve heard of so many experiences of people who tried to start over but had to face rejection, long hours, and life lessons to get to where they are now. Stop comparing your life to others on instagram and do what you need to do to make YOURSELF happy. It won’t always be what you want, but it will be what you will need. I hope that makes sense.

    Best of luck to you all!

    Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    More travel tips (for beginners)!

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    Hello everyone reading this 🙂

    If you’re new here, I have a thing for traveling. Lately I even tried to move to another state…oh and I’m still attempting to move. The truth is no matter how many times you spend packing your bags or at the airport, there is always something new you learn. Here are a few things I’ve picked up these past years.

    1. Checked Bags: As far as domestic flights go, Southwest is the only airline that will allow two FREE checked bags. However, if you are alone and plan on having more bags, it is $75 for the third so you just end up paying the same as another airline.
    2. Frequent Flyer Points: I never knew how simple it was to join a frequent flyer program. I have accounts with both Southwest and Alaska Airlines for FREE. This isn’t the same as a credit card, but I do still get points each time I fly with them. Yes, you can get points from Expedia purchases as well.
    3. Download Your Airlines App: Every airline has an app these days so make sure you have it before you take off. This makes it easier as you can not only have flight information sent to you in case something changes, but you can also check in when the time comes!
    4. Check Your Bags In On Time: I actually didn’t know this because I rarely check bags, but arrive AT LEAST 45 minutes before boarding to check your bags in. I was running late one time and checked my bags in 30 minutes prior to boarding and has a risk of getting them late. Fortunately, it worked out fine this time!
    5. Print Your Boarding Pass: We live in a time where everything is done electronically. As great as it is to have your boarding pass on your phone, I think it is still important to print it as well. Technology lets us down and sometimes we might let ourselves down and drop our phones. Just be safe and have an extra form of a boarding pass on hand.

    Have fun on your next adventure! Let me know if you are going on any trip this summer in the comments below!!!

    -Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    I’m Back Home After “Attempting” To Move Out.

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    The past few years (before this blog) I have been going on and on about moving to Nashville. A couple of weeks ago I made the BIG move. Unfortunately, it didn’t go the way I had planned. I wrote this blog post while I was there and kind of touched on my frustrations. Coming from a cultural background where moving out is not a thing unless you are getting married, I really didn’t know much about what it is actually like. There is nothing I regret about giving moving a try because there is a lot that I realized. I am currently home for about a month because there are a few things I need to sort out before I make the move again. As much as I love Nashville, it might not be the place for me at this point in my life. Do I see myself buying a house there when I’m ready to settle down? I think so, but for now I’m ready to put other things first.

    The 20’s are a time to be adventourous and make stupid mistakes without having too many priorities. My dream is to one day open up my own gymnastics facility, but to have my own business I wouldn’t have the freedom to move or travel as much. This is why now is my time to explore that side of life.

    What I realized:

    I would rather have a financially stable job right now and give a new city a try than live in the city if my dreams paycheck to paycheck.

    Since I was a teen I’ve always put my goals for my career first (partly because of my ocd). I guess not much has changed about that. Before I moved I was willing to settle for a job that maybe didn’t pay so much, but as long as I was in my favorite city everything would be alright. It turns out if I can’t make enough to explore and do all the things I love in that city, than what is the point?

    All in all maybe this wasn’t the right time for me to move to Nashville, but I’m not giving up on moving. I’ve already applied to some other cities and am looking forward to my next adventure.

    Have you had any unexpected experiences when moving away?

    Thanks for stopping by,

    Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    Two days in a new city. (I MOVED OUT!)

    lifestyle

    Like I mentioned in previous posts, I decided to move from Los Angeles, CA to Nashville, TN. I have been here for about 2 1/2 days doing the whole job hunting/apartment hunting craze. It was great when I first got here because I was just excited to even be here. Now…I’m starting to lose my cool.

    This is my first time being on my own so having to deal with rent to income ratio is STRESSING ME OUT. I’m in a new city trying to figure it all out, but I know I never will. After visiting a couple of places and making sure they are close proximity to some potential jobs makes it that much more challenging. I’ve been here before, but I guess I never realized how spread out things really are. I’m trying to sort this all out without running back home crying that I couldn’t do it. What makes it harder is that my mom is here with me so I feel like I almost need to validate why I CAN do this.

    After viewing a few places and almost deciding on a job, I have decided to lower my rent budget a bit and look at surrounding areas as well. My “job” is in a different town so I feel like being a bit more flexible with my options will be a lot more helpful. I just need to remind myself that everything is temporary and if I don’t like a certain apartment, I don’t have to be there forever. It’s hard adjusting to a new place so far from home, but I am still excited for what’s yet to come. (And a little terrified).

    Have a good rest of the week,

    Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    Things I say to help me get through the day.

    mental health, Uncategorized

    Wow life is catching up and it’s been hard getting these blog posts up. Hopefully once a week isn’t too bad for now. I’ll have a lot of traveling pictures up here pretty soon since I’m moving THIS WEEK! Anyways, I wanted to share some things that help me get through the rough moments of life that I’ve learned these past couple of years. Hope this helps you out if you need a little extra boost.

    “Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full.”

    This is something my dietician told me in treatment for my eating disorder. It may seem like common sense to most, but for someone with a bad relationship with food it can make the world of difference.

    “I let go of all the lies I tell myself.”

    I like this saying so much that I got it tattooed on me. It’s nice reminder when I’m busy looking at myself in the mirror trying to find as many “imperfections” as I can.

    “This is just temporary.”

    I think one of the hardest parts of the 20s is that we like to compare ourselves to everyone else. We think where we are now in life is forever, but it isn’t. If you need to work those 3 jobs to make your way to a career you will one day have, do it!

    “A picture can lie.”

    Sticking with the comparison issue that seems to be rising, we are all aware of the impact of social media. A picture is just a highlight of someone’s day, it isn’t their everyday.

    I hope this gives you a little mid week boost. Best of luck with your day or night. I’ll be doing my best to update regularly on here as I’m in the midst of moving. Follow if you’d like to keep up with the move!

    Thanks for stopping by,

    Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    That one time in Portland.

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    A few months ago I went on a trip to Portland, Oregon. Ever since then I’ve been trying to get this blog post up, but I wasn’t able to upload my pictures. Well, the pictures are here now! Being from California we hear a lot about Portland. We get told it’s a city filled with “hipsters” and is super quirky. To be honest, when I first got there I wasn’t that impressed. It was a lot like where I’m from so it wasn’t much of a different experience. However I grew to love certain neighborhoods and now find myself missing Portland a lot. From the beauty of the trees to the most amazing food. Here are a few of my favorite places in the city of weird.

    Neighborhood: Alberta

    A very artsy and youthful neighborhood with lots to do. Alberta not only has cool murals on the walls, but a couple of the streets are just filled with things to do. There’s small and unique stores for shopping and tasty places to eat at. My favorite spot there is definitely Salt & Straw for ice cream. Don’t pass up this awesome neighborhood if you’re ever near Portland.

    Coffee: Cathedral and Dutch Bros

    I am not going to lie. For the city that’s supposed to be all about it’s coffee, I was not that impressed. I am quite picky about my coffee and really only like iced drinks to be fair. There were a couple of places I did enjoy though. Cathedral coffeehouse can be found in the St. Johns neighborhood and let me just tell ya…I LOVE the chocolate chip cookies there. The coffee was quite tasty and the decor stood out too. Another coffee house which is a coffee chain is Dutch Bros. Not only is it affordable, but they have lots of unique flavors of coffee as well. It’s hard to get disappointed there.

    Scenery: Forest Park and

    One of the best things about Portland is that it is pretty much surrounded by trees. That was the first thing I noticed at least. I knew I had to go hiking when I was planning my trip, so I definitely made time for it. I went on a hike around Forest Park. The hike itself isn’t very difficult so you are able to take in the beauty of scenery there. With extremely tall trees I mean who wouldn’t want to break out into an impromptu photoshoot?!

    Food:

    Okay this part was definitely the BEST part of my trip, haha! The food in this city is brilliant! Pine State Biscuits serves some of the best southern food from a non southern state. Plus side is it’s is also located in my favorite neighborhood, Alberta. One of the places I ate at the most was Grassa. It is a casual pasta cafe. You order then sit, so when you’re ordering do yourself a favor and get the garlic bread. If you’re looking for a small plates option Tasty n Sons. Everything I got from there was delicious! As for dessert, Voodoo donuts is your best bet despite the long line. I’d say it’s worth the hype. Lastly, I can’t forget the food markets. I went to a really small one, but still found some awesome food and fresh drinks. Food markets have to be on your to do list for sure!

    I hope this post gives you some ideas if you plan on visiting the city of Portland. If not, I hope it gives you the travelling bug like it did me…oops.

    Happy Weekend,

    Suzy [fragile, yet fearless]

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    Three thereapeutic activities worth trying!

    lifestyle

    Let’s face it, life is tough. We’ve all got something going on. Jobs, school, kids, health problems, etc. One thing I’ve learned is that self care is ALWAYS a good idea. We can’t forget to take care of ourselves. Taking a break isn’t selfish, but it’s something needed in order for us to get our daily tasks done. Of course everyone has their own way to wind down at the end of the day, but here are 3 things that have really helped me.

       1. Pampering/Getting my nails done. 


    Getting my nails done or even doing them is calming and I get to just sit there for about an hour doing nothing. It makes me feel good about myself after. It’s like I’m putting in the effort to look after myself. If you do it at home, try looking up videos online and try some new designs!

      2. Baking!


    You don’t have to be an expert to bake! The internet is filled with recipes to try. I find baking to be a great distraction as I have to follow step by step instructions and at the end you get rewarded with your own baked goods! I’ll soon be posting a recipe for cinnamon cookies that I love to bake this time of year. It’s super easy too!

      3. Hiking/walking

    Going on a hike or a walk around your neighborhood can be so calming! It’s nice to just be doing an activity where I’m not staring my phone or a computer screen for hours. And afterwards I feel better because I got moving and feel like I accomplished something. 
    These are just a couple of things I like to do that are easy enough to get done. If you’ve made it this far… thanks for reading! 

    -Suzy [Fragile, yet fearless]
     

    Bucket List 

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    A lot of my blog posts consist of traveling as it’s something that I believe gives you the most independence. Traveling is eye opening, thrilling, educational, and simply just fun. Although I’ve gone to a lot of the places I always wanted to visit, there are still a lot of destinations that I haven’t been to. Here’s my bucket list of places I need to visit  (hoping this will push me to do so). 

    1. Brighton (U.K.)
    2. Stockholm (Sweden)
    3. Scotland 
    4. Newcastle (U.K.)
    5. Italy (mainly for the food.haha)
    6. Santorini (Greece)
    7. Spain
    8. Argentina 
    9. Seattle, Washington (USA)
    10. Charleston, SC (USA)

    I think that pretty much covers places I MUST go to. Of course I’m hoping to add more to this list once I start checking some of these off. Do you have any recommendations of places I should visit? Have you been to or are you from any of the ones listed above? Let me know!!!


    Hope you’re haveing a great Sunday!

    -Suzy [Fragile, yet fearless]
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    I Love You London!

    travel


    After years of obsessing over the U.K. And the English culture, I finally had the chance to visit last year. I always wanted to go to the small towns in England and cities that most international visitors don’t go to. When I ended up in London I didn’t expect to like it much because sometimes a big city is just a big city. After spending some time there I realized I actually realized…
    I love London for

    Beautiful Architecture

    Coffee that’s actually good


    Views for days


    Afternoon Tea (Obviously)


    Sweets (had to bring back with me)!!!


    Public transportation that’s actually not bad

    And Shopping!!!



    I definitely plan on visiting again, but I’ll also be visiting other parts of England too! 
    Happy Weekend! 

    Suzy [Fragile, yet fearless]


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